Mores – strongly held social norms. Their violation arouses a sense of moral outrage.
I am reading the novel Tess of the D’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy. Actually, I have to confess, I read 2/3rd of it about 3 months ago, then stopped, and haven’t picked it up again until last night. This is not a good book to read when you are single, dating, but failing again and again to find the right person.
Tess was born to a poor family in the 1800’s and they discover they might be related to a wealthy family called the D’Urbervilles. Class lines in those days meant if you were born poor, you had little chance to improve your lot in life. So Tess’s parents send her to the remaining widow of this family line to beg for money and a position in her household. The widow has a cad of a son. He tricks innocent Tess and rapes her, leaving her pregnant. Tess returns in disgrace to her family. The baby dies, and Tess is sent to be a milkmaid on a farm. She and a gentleman farmer, staying at the dairy to learn the trade, fall in love. Tess is afraid to tell him of her past and finally confesses the night of their marriage.
This is where the story gets worse and why I couldn’t finish. Clare, her husband, has not led a perfect life, and it is made clear that he has had several indiscretions himself. Yet, when he finds out that Tess is not a virgin, he becomes cold and rejects her. I haven’t been able to read any since that part of the plot. I’m afraid it won’t have a happy ending.
A woman gets blamed for being raped. There was no compassion for her. I understand that life was harsher back then. In a society without social security programs, it was vital that a baby was born into a traditional family, so that it received the necessary social and economic support. There was little room for deviation from established norms. In Dickenson novels, poor people are "jailed" in poorhouses, rather than given a helping hand. There they fester and die. Killing them would have been more merciful. A scarlet woman became an outcast and was forced to beg or glean scrapes for a living.
Even in the 50’s when I was born, there was a more rigid societal structure. There was no room for single women. They were called spinsters. There was no room for anyone who didn’t fit into the expected norms. Some people say that we should revert back to that harsher time. That the Bible says we should live only one way. I read a different Bible. My Bible says that love is most important. That we are to treat the different with compassion and hope and love. That is the world I live in.
